A note from Baba

I found a book we bought back in Australia recently under our sofa. Its one of those baby books which you fill in with your childs first pictures, first lock of hair, details of the birth etc etc. One of the topics asked how did you feel when you first found out your were expecting a child and it threw me back in time to that fateful day in February - Valentines Day to be exact.

We were at the airport in Singapore, waiting for our flight back to Taipei, when Tam rushed over with the good news. The evidence was there on that skinny little strip of paper whose declaration of purple or blue lineage heralded the beginning of a brand new and exciting adventure for both of us.

Although we had been 'trying' for a while the announcement caused a reaction in me that, at the the time seemed normal, but looking back may sound a little strange. I was almost dumbfounded and lost for words when I heard those six little words - You're going to be a dad! - and as I hugged my joyous wife I couldn't stop my mind from racing at 100miles per hour over our lives and what would have to change.

All the things I still wanted to do and all the places I still wanted to go to with Tam:Japan, China, Canada, India..I felt them all slip away in that instant. Now we had another life to think about, a gift that would bring us so much more than the great wall or a Mt Fuji or Taj Mahal ever could but in those first moments that was where my mind was jammed. All the coulda's, woulda's and shoulda's.

'It's good that you've got a chance to travel and see the world when you are young because once you have kids it all changes...' the echoes of older heads rang through my head like warning bells that until this point in life I had successfully heeded. They always seemed to speak about having children with such finality as if once it all happened that was it. Your life was effectively over.

And what about careers and your own dreams, professional and personal? Here I was, a 34year old with no real career behind me, just a succession of jobs that had offered me enjoyment and satisfaction to varying degrees but nothing of which I had imagined myself doing as a pimply faced 18year old embarking on life beyond high school. It seemed I had always taken a detour from the main road when it came to my professional life and then another one, each one taking me further and further away from that ideal job, whatever that was because at 34 I still hadn't really found it.

I had always hoped that before I settled down with children I would have something secure, well-paying and satisfying in regard to a profession. But here I was, the preverbial 'Jack of all trades'(Bank teller, dish washer, English teacher, office clerk, DJ) looking down the barrel of that new adventure with none of the above. I felt myself lacking in so many ways.

Eventually I brought up some of my concerns with Tam over what I felt were some of my life's missed opportunities. Still glowing from the confirmation on the 8 hour flight home she told me just what I needed to hear: just because you have kids it doesn't mean your life is over. Sure many things will change but hey, kids can be portable. See it as a beginning not as an end.

It was just the tonic I needed.

As kids, my sisters and I were fortunate to travel all around Australia with our parents. Our annual jaunts cruising across the country in Dad's Statesman Deville towing the caravan where hardly glamourous but it gave us the chance to see there was an incredible world outside of our small Gippsland town: One that was definitely worth investigating.

As we got older all three of us left our sunburnt country to explore lands and peoples in different parts of the world. Still filled with the wanderlust that only travel can offer, my wife(who's also caught the travel bug) and I now reside in Taiwan far away from our home land and our families. Looking back I'm really thankful for what my folks offered me as a little kid. Perth, the Gold Coast, Bundaberg, Auckland(NZ), Nu ku alofa(Tonga).. those words became more that names on a map for me .

And then it all hit me. If I can offer our child some of what I have learnt in my admittedly hickledy-pickledy, all-over-the shop, global travelling life, then really my distinct lack of career, qualifications, $$$, life direction.... it really doesn't matter that much after all.

Somethings in life are worth so much more. It just takes moments and changes in your life like the birth of a new child to make you realize it.

My wife is an amazing person. She is loving, caring and strong and she is really going to make a fabulous mother. In just over 10 weeks from now I'm going to start work on my newest, most important and undoubtedly the most difficult job of my life. One that doesn't need a degree or diploma or three references from previous employers....

Wish me luck!